Another suicide.
We read the headline, feel bad for a few minutes, blame someone, and move on.
But we already know what happened.
Someone died.
The more important question is:
Why did the person reach there?
Mujhe pata hain isko bukhar hain. But ishe bukhar kyun hain?
Let's look at a few familiar stories.
1. The IIT Student
A student dies inside an IIT.
Immediately, we talk about academic pressure.
Fair enough.
But why did he choose IIT?
Because he wanted to learn?
Or because he was taught that IIT means a good package, money, respect, status and eventually a “successful life”?
Nobody is born knowing that IIT is success.
Someone teaches us that.
And most of us never question the script.
Then reality arrives.
Someone gets a better package.
Someone scores more.
Someone is ahead.
The life the ego imagined doesn't happen.
And the ego says:
“I failed.”
But who created this definition of success?
The body becomes the victim of an expectation created by the ego.
2. The Woman and Dowry
A woman dies because of dowry pressure.
We blame the husband and in-laws.
And rightly so when there is abuse.
But let's ask another uncomfortable question.
When the marriage deal was being made, what exactly were both families expecting from it?
Money.
Status.
Security.
A “good family”.
A “good life”.
The ego gets a taste of fulfilling one desire and then wants another.
One peg becomes two.
One expectation becomes another.
And when reality doesn't deliver what the ego demanded, the person who cannot satisfy the social role becomes the victim.
Again, the body suffers.
But the disease started much earlier.
The moment human life became a deal.
3. The Man Trapped in Marriage
A man dies because of pressure from his wife and in-laws.
Again, we take sides.
But perhaps we should look underneath the conflict.
What did he expect marriage to give him?
Love?
Respect?
Validation?
Social acceptance?
Perhaps he believed marriage would finally prove that he was successful, desirable and important.
But what happens when the wife doesn't validate him?
When the in-laws don't respect him?
When the marriage doesn't look like the picture in his head?
The ego stops receiving the validation it was depending on.
And when the ego cannot flatter itself anymore, the body can become the victim.
The deal wasn't successful for him either.
Because perhaps he entered marriage looking for validation rather than understanding what marriage actually is.
4. The iPhone
Recently, a boy died over an iPhone, while his parents also died trying to save him.
It sounds absurd.
How can a phone become more important than life?
Because perhaps it was never just a phone.
It was status.
It was being cool.
It was belonging.
It was proving:
“I am not less than others.”
This is what the ego does.
It turns objects into identities.
A phone becomes status.
A car becomes success.
Money becomes worth.
Followers become importance.
Marriage becomes validation.
And when the ego cannot consume what it wants, it feels hurt.
Then somehow the body gets blamed for the ego's failure.
We keep asking:
“Why did he kill himself?”
But perhaps the better question is:
“What did we teach him to live for?”
Marks.
Packages.
Marriage.
Money.
Beauty.
Status.
Possessions.
Social approval.
And if all of these disappear tomorrow—
who are you?
That is the question most of us never ask.
We simply keep collecting identities until one day reality takes one of them away.
And then we discover how fragile the person behind that identity actually was.
Suicide is not always explained by one thing. Mental illness, trauma, abuse, depression and unbearable circumstances are real and must be treated with compassion and professional help.
But if we only discuss the final act, we are treating the fever.
We should also examine the disease.
Perhaps the deeper question is not:
“Why did he die?”
But:
“Why did he believe that life was no longer worth living when he couldn't become what his ego demanded?”
Maybe the body was only the final victim.
The ego had been suffering long before.